What I Learned: The Three Bones of Networking
The transformative power of networking through the '3 Bones' framework: defining desires, showcasing competence with humility, and embracing persistence in your career journey.
Hi everyone,
Before the winter holiday period, I had a really impactful conversation with a partner at the firm. We spoke about our careers, interests, etc., and to be direct, I decided that it was time to consider what comes next after attaining my CPA designation. I also realized, despite working at the firm for almost three years, that I had almost no idea what our other practices do.
Following the conversation, I took the nerve-wracking jump to reach out to a number of partners at the firm in lines of service outside our core assurance practice to ask if they’d be willing to have a 30-minute coffee chat. I didn’t ask for anything else, just an opportunity to ask them questions and learn about some of the other services we offer.
Coincidentally, as I’ve been having these coffee chats, I came across this brilliant TEDx Talk by Isaac Serwanga called ‘The 3 Bones of Networking for Student Success’. To summarize, in the video, Isaac presents a 3-node framework for successful networking. Here are my takeaways from his speech:
Wishbone - Know what you want. Don't network aimlessly. No one can help you if you don’t know what you want yourself. Ask yourself what direction you want to go in, reach out to the people who can make it happen, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.
Jawbone - The jawbone in Isaac’s framework has two parts: Competency and humility. You don’t have to be an expert, but ensure you do your research beforehand. You need to know what you’re talking about, or else you’re wasting the other person's time and they’ll be able to tell. The second part, humility, means that you’re not trying to impress anyone. People have to like you. So, if someone gives you their time, respect it, respect them, and genuinely try to learn something from them rather than showing off how much you know.
Backbone - Bolstering your backbone is probably the most important. You have to be determined. Most people you reach out to won’t reply or will politely decline. This has nothing to do with you; people are just busy. Keep networking, keep reaching out to new people, and follow up if they don’t reply at first. At some point, you’ll get lucky, and just a single conversation can open many doors.
I think we all know these things inherently, but Isaac’s framework has really helped with the conversations I’ve been having. For instance, before each meeting I’ve been setting my Wishbone clear in my head by writing down the three main things I want to learn or get out of my next career move. It’s the same thing each time, but writing it down prior to the meeting keeps me focused.
To ensure my Jawbone is ready, I do the following:
As a reminder, I write down a quick list of my qualifications.
I do as much research about the other person as I can. This includes inspecting their LinkedIn profile, any articles they are mentioned in, and any news that might be relevant to their area of expertise.
I write down a list of 5-10 key questions I want to learn from them. This helps me keep the conversation going if it comes to a pause, keeps me in a learner's position to stop me from talking too much about myself, and ensures I get exactly the information I want out of the conversation.
Finally, in terms of the Backbone, I just try to keep in mind that rejection is normal and not personal. Of the 6-7 partners I reached out to, 3 replied and were open to a conversation. But, because I am coming into these conversations so prepared, they are going amazingly. Each partner has connected me with a few other people as well, and I am learning an incredible amount.
Networking is one of those things that comes and goes in your life in terms of importance, and truthfully it’s a skill I think I can really improve on. However, Isaac’s 3-bone framework has really helped me come into these meetings not only prepared to learn but also to make an impression and see results.
Hopefully, you found this helpful, and I highly recommend watching Isaac’s speech linked above.